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Sunday, December 27, 2009
truth be told, i cant really translate or interpret what i wanna say or express myself from spoken words to a text. i really suck at it. my other friends know that. they stay clear of me. they exile me. make up stories. and that makes what i am today. a loser. but its okay, i understand. when i type my language like snake. i complicate things *i've wasted a significant amount of paper during English paper 1 during GCE 'O' Levels. and my compo is cocky* my health is getting worse each day. the pain in my chest is still there but its not as painful as how it used to be. i have low blood pressure.and anemia minor. i cant move around so much. i cant be in a crowded place. if not i'll end up lying on the floor *you know what i mean*.fever. dont care about my health. all i need is to swallow some pills. not some.. a concoction of pills. then i'll be up and running. hmmph. my mood now is at its worst. its a good thing mom and pop is not here. if not, i guess there'll be a war or something. i'll just pray for them and their safety. ive been dwelling about the past. suffering and crying, present time. hoping the best for my future. i feel so dead now. i want my life back. i dont want to lose my teenage life to depression. i want the old me back. i want my friends back. i want to live my life. how im feeling right now hurts and it kills me. i know it sounds stupid but since late 2007, ive been thinking about suicide. and planning it all in my head. the pain. and sure thing, i dont think it would affect anyone of my friends but i know it will affect my mom. i feel so hopeless. forget it. i'm not worth any tears. it takes two hands to clap, im missing another hand. |
Zee CW ★ " Zee CW, the kid who always step on the pavement cracks, and blames herself, then she ran back home to her crib where she cry and cry.." Too Little Too Late - Jojo -MB0902 -Andre -Desmond -Isabelle -Michelle -Ralene -Angie -Maurice -Daryl -Dynie -Geri -Qraisha -Ifah December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 June 2010 July 2010 Designer : Chili. x o x o |